Post by Nadora Toza (Marissa Ludlow) on Nov 2, 2015 17:23:04 GMT -8
**The writing in this journal is very fine and precise. The font scrolling and beautiful as though the words were artwork themselves.**
I have decided that I should begin writing. Perhaps it will help me to sort out the thoughts that tumble within my head. I am sitting within the tavern as I write this, it seems a common place for me to be as of late. I find that I am having difficulty making my way on this isle. I am neither animal enough nor human enough to belong to either I think. Aoife seems to be getting along just fine, but I, as usual, am having a very hard time letting anyone in so that I may make potential friends. Do not mistake me, I have met some wonderful people as well as some not so wonderful ones. Aoife and I were attacked in the tavern a few nights past by a drow. Luckily, an elf that I had met previously was also in the tavern and chased the male away while I tried to heal Aoife. It is not my strongest magic, but the spell at least made it so that she could return to her home and rest.
A few days ago, I left an offering to the Goddess. I thought perhaps that if I presented her with things that were valuable to me as a sacrifice that she may reveal my path to me. I have seen no sign or hint of what I am meant to be or do here, I feel lost. I struggle terribly with the emotions within myself. When Aoife was attacked, I desperately wanted to cast as many spells as I could at that drow and obliterate him from the living plane but I refrained. The storm within me grows, becoming harder to control. I feel myself wanting...no...needing to use my magic, like an addiction I get a rush from it. It was never this way while I was learning and granny never mentioned anything about it. Perhaps that it is just that I feel lost and my magic is the only thing that I know is certain, it has never failed me.
Even the Ancestors have been silent as of late. I did see one spirit in the tavern, but it was not someone I had known so I did not speak to him. I have been trying to interact with people, be pleasant and kind. I am afraid though. I have been trying to control this growing...I'm not even sure what it is, something within me is changing. I am not the contented and peaceful person I once was. Gethin tells me not to worry, but that falcon does not worry about anything save his stomach. I know that there are other Therians on this isle, but if I have met one I am unaware. I have spoken to the cook at the tavern and he told me that the wolves here are quite aggressive. I am unsure if that is the right place for me. With whatever is happening to me, aggression may not be the best idea right now. I believe that I will sleep on it. Perhaps the Goddess will deem to send me a dream to help lighten my spirit.
I have decided that I should begin writing. Perhaps it will help me to sort out the thoughts that tumble within my head. I am sitting within the tavern as I write this, it seems a common place for me to be as of late. I find that I am having difficulty making my way on this isle. I am neither animal enough nor human enough to belong to either I think. Aoife seems to be getting along just fine, but I, as usual, am having a very hard time letting anyone in so that I may make potential friends. Do not mistake me, I have met some wonderful people as well as some not so wonderful ones. Aoife and I were attacked in the tavern a few nights past by a drow. Luckily, an elf that I had met previously was also in the tavern and chased the male away while I tried to heal Aoife. It is not my strongest magic, but the spell at least made it so that she could return to her home and rest.
A few days ago, I left an offering to the Goddess. I thought perhaps that if I presented her with things that were valuable to me as a sacrifice that she may reveal my path to me. I have seen no sign or hint of what I am meant to be or do here, I feel lost. I struggle terribly with the emotions within myself. When Aoife was attacked, I desperately wanted to cast as many spells as I could at that drow and obliterate him from the living plane but I refrained. The storm within me grows, becoming harder to control. I feel myself wanting...no...needing to use my magic, like an addiction I get a rush from it. It was never this way while I was learning and granny never mentioned anything about it. Perhaps that it is just that I feel lost and my magic is the only thing that I know is certain, it has never failed me.
Even the Ancestors have been silent as of late. I did see one spirit in the tavern, but it was not someone I had known so I did not speak to him. I have been trying to interact with people, be pleasant and kind. I am afraid though. I have been trying to control this growing...I'm not even sure what it is, something within me is changing. I am not the contented and peaceful person I once was. Gethin tells me not to worry, but that falcon does not worry about anything save his stomach. I know that there are other Therians on this isle, but if I have met one I am unaware. I have spoken to the cook at the tavern and he told me that the wolves here are quite aggressive. I am unsure if that is the right place for me. With whatever is happening to me, aggression may not be the best idea right now. I believe that I will sleep on it. Perhaps the Goddess will deem to send me a dream to help lighten my spirit.